Got up this morning feeling awful, like i had hit rock bottom again, I just wanted to stay in bed and not move but i knew I had to because I had promised uncle I would go and give him a hand clearing some things up has he is having work done on his house.
Mum was also coming which meant if i needed to nip out I could if it was do go shop or go take the dogs for a walk, I had that plan of not feeling caged in.
We got to uncles had a brew and then got to work, mum needed somethings so that was the perfect chance for me to nip out, I walked from my uncles to the supermarket, which was about 25-30 mins walk, give or take
I did have a moment where I got tearful, I walk past my old studio building and i was hit of feeling of not being good enough, of failing.
I manged to stop the tears falling but still it felt heavy on my chest.
I got what mum needed from the shop and we carried on doing what we was doing, uncle asked me to stay for tea again and when mum had gone we had a good chat about things, and i gotta admit he made me feel a little better.
I think next to Midnight and Ally he is the only one that gets me because he had experiences like mine so he understands and never judges me on what I say he just listens, and i think sometimes that’s what I need some one to listen.